The Ghost Of You Keeps Me Awake

"Your words have resonated deep,

way deep into my soul, 

while your shallow mind creeps,

towards the illuminating cold.

I'm thinking in my mind again,

much too much,

thank you for a memory filled with your masked illusions.

But, they are too much to escape,

and just enough to leave a nostalgic ease."

Dear Oliver James,

     I'm yet another victim in your spider web of lies, deceit and false truths.

     How you did it is truly an art to see, and it is my luck that I have been chosen among the few to help you create such a masterpiece. If I had known beforehand, would I have  changed my crumbling responses, my weak attempts at strength?

     We could've had a summer bliss, while your fingertips slowly caressed the outline of my jaw, and continued to trail down towards my neck. An, as my pulse quickens and both of our breaths are hitched into an excitement of please. I felt your lips kiss my rushed words and broken promises.

     You never once kissed me underneath the midnight sky, but instead; smothered my days with your blinding ultraviolet rays of sunlight.

     Willing to distort my vision with your presence while you toyed with my heart strings like a violin. I added color to your piece of art, I allowed your picture to speak a thousand words, and while you wove my vulnerable beating soul into a knot of a masterpiece, I conceded with each movement, as a way to just be with you.

Just for us to be a "Me & You."

     And now as you ask me to just "listen" to the truth behind it all, I question myself if I should allow you the chance to watch me shred myself into a desperate crawl.

I have been cursed.

I have been manipulated.

I have been mesmerized by you, and oh, how you did it too well.

Torn apart and open to dry,

I am only left with pride,

And sometimes even that my dear, isn't enough to guide me through yet another day.

     So, now as I hesitantly walk this road of affliction; I can gradually feel the ocean's cool breeze sweep my hair away from my red eyes and into a mane. So, I may be a lion, a leader, a conductor towards Utter Bliss.

     Although, our paths crossed and kissed each other's presence, does not mean that we are both destined for one another; and that's okay. My shattered mind, and ache of a heart shouldn't and will not restrict me towards my happiness, well being, self contentment and road towards Utter Bliss.

     Now, if I may; I believe I will excuse myself to a small pity party in the corner while I cry myself to sleep. You know, it's not like you broke my heart; you just made me believe that there was the possibility of something. You broke the rules, and chose to make a presence, an ever growing aftertaste once the coffee beans have done their job. 

     I may not have a "Me & You," but I do have your ghost; and that's the one who keeps me awake in the wee hours. Resent solitude, there is something flooding through my veins and it's the heart ache of - once again; Me &You.

     Sincerely,

     A World Of Lingering Possibility